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Staff Sergeant Jack Jackson

aka Poji Keisatsu

867 Edits since joining Dragon Ball Fanon:
July 22, 2012

Hi there!

Example

Welcome!

Welcome to Dragonball Fanon Wiki, and thank you for your contributions! There's a lot to do around here, so I hope you'll stay with us and make many more improvements.

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We are really happy to have you here, and look forward to working with you! And, please leave a message on my talk page if I can help with anything! Happy Editting! -- Hyper Zergling (Talk) 01:57, July 22, 2012

Re:

Spike was created by you, and therefore, he is not canon. ~Hyper Zergling 04:06, August 21, 2012 (UTC)

I'm sorry about HZ, he can be rather oblivious sometimes. -KidVegeta (talk)
Yes, my mistake, and KidVegeta already explained it. ~Hyper Zergling 19:18, August 21, 2012 (UTC)

Drawing Request Finished

Sorry it took so long, I was done with it a while ago but I just got my printer working again. Gozon 22:41, October 4, 2012 (UTC)
Vegito

Vegito

Re: my character

Dat pillar
Hyper Zergling — Gonna get copied:
TALK — Saturday, 20 December 2014
Super Saiyan 4+? Involvement with Xicor in AF? Randomly named? I'm really sorry, but I have nothing good to say about Jamie.



Dat pillar
Hyper Zergling — Gonna get copied:
TALK — Saturday, 20 December 2014
He's involved in the events of AF.

What reason is there to name him after yourself? All full-blood saiyans' names are puns on vegetables.


You name thief, Jack Johnson is an artist! LEAVE HIS NAME ALONE! AkurnaSkulblaka (talk) 00:49, January 9, 2013 (UTC)

It was a joke. Geez I thought the name was punny. Ease up a little, you butthole. AkurnaSkulblaka (talk) 22:01, January 9, 2013 (UTC)


Dat pillar
Hyper Zergling — Gonna get copied:
TALK — Saturday, 20 December 2014
Achievements mean nothing, and almost-300 edits are far too few.


In my opinion, writing 'jk' is a completely pointless endeavor. If the other person does not understand that it is a joke, then too bad for them. But don't get sassy. Since when does someone call another person a 'name thief' and get away with it being serious? Think about it. Just for a second, please. AkurnaSkulblaka (talk) 22:54, January 9, 2013 (UTC)

Re:

990 achievement points isn't all that high, as 20 people are ranked ahead of you (17 of which are not admins). And the edit count isn't that high, either. Besides, neither of those carry much weight in determination of the user's potential. You have to be consistently active, and engaged with the community, which, unfortunately, I have no evidence of you doing. -KidVegeta (talk)

Re:invalid reason

Tarble6
KidVegeta — Whatever ya say, boss:
TALK — Saturday, 20 December 2014
Well, you just corrected some of those problems today. HZ made that list a long time ago, before you did correct those problems. As for the grammar, it's in every section. I'm assuming English isn't your native language.




Tarble6
KidVegeta — Whatever ya say, boss:
TALK — Saturday, 20 December 2014
In what way are you being disrespected?




Dat pillar
Hyper Zergling — Gonna get copied:
TALK — Saturday, 20 December 2014
I am allowed to NCF an article when there is something wrong with it that warrants an NCF template. Just because the rest of an article isn't NCF doesn't mean the whole page isn't.


Re: Recontruction

Done. ~Hyper Zergling 02:18, March 5, 2014 (UTC)

I don't really have much of an opinion, to be honest. ~Hyper Zergling 04:00, March 5, 2014 (UTC)

Re:vandal

Thanks for letting me know. I've banned him and reverted the edits. -KidVegeta (talk)

Dragon Ball AF Sequel?

Your reincarnation of Dragon Ball AF is incredible! It would be really great should you make a bigger sequel!

Re: Reconstruction (cont.)

Dat pillar
Hyper Zergling — Gonna get copied:
TALK — Saturday, 20 December 2014

"He lacks a Widow Peak like Goku and Bardock does meaning that Raditz's having a Widow's Peak is likely from Gine, their mother"
— Jamie's page



Dat pillar
Hyper Zergling — Gonna get copied:
TALK — Saturday, 20 December 2014
Done.


Re: question

It was drawn by Malik666. I believe he is still doing commissions (although he did my Ledas one for free, so I don't know how much they are). -KidVegeta (talk)

Sharotto

Dat pillar
Hyper Zergling — Gonna get copied:
TALK — Saturday, 20 December 2014
I've noticed that you undid KidVegeta's edit of removing Sharotto from the canon character category. Although he may be expanded from the original super saiyan, the original super saiyan isn't canonically named "Sharotto."


Re: question

She would be 1/2 android, 1/4 human, 1/4 saiyan. -KidVegeta (talk)

Heyya!

Goku by dony910-d55gxpr
Fangirl4545 — You Talkin' to me!:
TALK — Saturday, 20 December 2014
Yo!

I've been reading a lot of your pages recently and... When are you gonna start writing chapters? I think this story has great potential! Oh, and can you also check out my story as well? I just want your opinion on it.

See ya! ;)



Thoughts

Be sure to link all of your pages together so it's easier to navigate. Also, I prefer reading stories that are actually stories (instead of summaries, like yours), but I think you are doing a fine enough job. You should submit your pages to the 2014 Dragon Ball Fanon awards ceremony too. I think Jamie was already nominated, but I don't think any of your others have been nominated yet. -KidVegeta (talk)

Jaime review

I can give you a quick list of pros and cons from my personal opinion tomorrow. I also have not read Hyper Zergling's review of the character, so I'll just write down the pros and cons for things that stick out to me on the page. -KidVegeta (talk)

Jamie quick review

I did not include points on his AF section, since I haven't read all of that story.

Pros:

  • The page is presented well. I think you did well with the infobox and the various header sections. I would recommend splitting appearance and personality into their own sections (as they are vastly different things), though.
  • I think Jamie losing his Saiyan identity was a unique idea.
  • I think the idea of True Super Saiyan 2 is good.
  • I don't mind Jamie having all of the canon Super Saiyan forms, so long as they are given good explanations. I think many of them are, though the ones he achieved simply through training are very boring and lame (see my con about this below).
  • The fusions with Goku are acceptable and described well enough.
  • Fight and kill sections are really good. Quotes is good as well, though there are some grammar issues. I would also recommend giving him more quotes in general. Two doesn't seem like enough. Maybe closer to 10 would be good.
  • Jamie's Saiyan name is good. I think it's unique (and therefore interesting/good) that he chose a different name after leaving his homeworld.
  • The categories at the bottom of the page are fine, though there are probably a few dozen more you could add to Jamie's page.
  • I think most of Jamie's abilities are good. He has some slightly overpowered combinations, what with having almost all of the best abilities, but it's okay. The abilities I don't like are specifically mentioned in the cons below. You should also work to removing red links from your page by either making the pages they link to or linking them to the Dragon Ball Wiki. This is particularly noteworthy in the techniques section, where you have a lot of red links.

Cons:

  • "As Saiyan he retains his pride and openly expresses embarrassment when forced to do something non-warrior like. As using the Fusion Dance." - this is not grammatically correct.
  • "Jamie is sensitive about people with scissor and going near his hair." - scissor should be scissors.
  • Jamie's personality to me is too stuish. He's smart, kindhearted, confident (without being arrogant), and cheerful with no negative emotions. Even being impatient and hot-headed are not negative personality traits by default. Because of this, he doesn't seem like a real character. He's too unrealistic because his personality is too perfect.
  • Goku's family was a low-class family. King Vegeta would not have been a godfather to any of their children. I would be surprised if he even knew who any of them were.
  • King Vegeta wouldn't banish Jamie for being weak. Since he's a low-class Saiyan, he would be sent to a planet to clear it, like Goku and all the others were.
  • I also don't see why King Vegeta would bother doing anything with Jamie. It's mentioned that he learns how to control Great Ape because King Vegeta teaches him, but this is very OOC for King Vegeta to do. Jamie is a low-class Saiyan by birth. He is not worth the King's time.
  • The Western Supreme Kai was killed by Majin Buu. Also, since Jamie is born about 4 million years after the Kais' encounter with Buu, it's unrealistic that the Western Supreme Kai would still be wounded.
  • Only Namekians make Dragon Balls. I don't see why Namekians would be on the planet with the Supreme Kai. I also see no legitimate reason for Jamie to want to heal her.
  • I don't see how Jamie would learn of the Cell Games. Since he's not on Earth, it's not relevant to him, but also, since Cell had no space presence, no one off of Earth, in the regular universe, would know.
  • I don't like how Jamie was so powerful, especially at a young age. That he would have False Super Saiyan while King Vegeta was still alive (something not even Broly would have been able to use at that age) is not something I'm fond of.
  • Jamie doesn't need to stay in Super Saiyan for 10 days to get FPSS. I think it's kind of boring, frankly, that you make him get it in the exact same way that Goku and Gohan did. A few more days, a few less days, it doesn't matter. Something different would be better. Also, since he wouldn't know he was getting Full Powered Super Saiyan from staying in Super Saiyan, it could happen accidentally.
  • The description for Super Saiyan 1: "Jamie first achieved this while he was 15 years old, explaining at the time his was already at the level of a Super Saiyan, the seeing an alien father abuse his on feel he transformed in the response of need." doesn't make any sense. It needs to be re-written in coherent English before I can comment on if his unlocking of the form is cool.
  • Even Goku and Gohan and Vegeta use Super Saiyan 1 after unlocking higher forms, so I don't like that he completely abandons it when he reaches Super Saiyan 2. It isn't consistent with other characters, in-universe.
  • "Jamie unlocks this Super Saiyan 2 form through intensive training and determination. In this form his arm grows to half the length of a Super Saiyan 3 and it coats him in a Flame Aura that never disappears adding 20Gs of the gravity he can held making him slow. In this form, his is half-faster than a Super Saiyan 2, but half-slower then a Super Saiyan 3." - this section needs to be re-written in grammatically correct, coherent English. You often say "his" instead of "he" or "Jamie", so work on that. It's a basic thing.
  • I don't like how Jamie has earned Super Saiyan 2 and 3 without anything meaningful happen. He just gets it while training. This was a major problem with the Majin Buu sagas of DBZ, where Vegeta's SS2 and Goku's SS3 unlockings were never shown. Gohan's SS2 on the other hand is one of the best moments in DBZ, and having Jamie have similar unlocks (like with his SS1) will make his character seem to matter more.
  • I'm not a fan of fanon Super Saiyan forms in general. Only if they are presented with the utmost skill and reservation do I like them. I don't think there is a need to have so many fanon Super Saiyan forms. For my taste, you shouldn't even do Super Saiyan 5.
  • All of the new Great Ape forms are something that I think I may like more than the Super Saiyan forms, but you don't really explain what they are on Jamie's page.
  • I don't like the idea of Jamie fusing with an Eternal Dragon. That reeks of Gary Stu to me.
  • I really don't like the idea of Jamie being able to grant wishes.
  • I don't see why the trivia about the Kamehameha is noteworthy. Most people in DBZ don't use that attack.
  • "Also he is one few people to use Spirit Bomb" - that is grammatically incorrect. Perhaps say "Also, he is one of only a few people who can use the Spirit Bomb."

-KidVegeta (talk)

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